Have you ever spoken white lies? I think most people don’t like lying, but sometimes we speak white lies for our safety or benefits. Normally, parents teach their children not to lie. When I read the title ‘Mothers admit to parenting lies, Netsmum survey says’, it makes me laughing. I wonder about what parenting lies are.
According to the article, many mothers are under pressure to competition to be a perfect mother. Netmums' Siobhan Freegard said “Mothers need to be more honest with each other”. Mothers themselves compare with other mothers. When mothers talk their friends or others about their children, they feel difficult to tell the truth each other so that they tell a lie. After telling a lie, they try to do that they lie about child-rearing to the others. Psychologist Dr Linda Papadopoulos advised to avoid comparing themselves with other and believe that you are a best for you and your kid.
‘Mother friend’s son’ is a new catch phase in my country, Korea. It means a son of a mother’s friend do well everything. Many mothers tell their son that my friend’s son is a good student and received scholarships etc. Mother had a meeting with her fiends after then she started to compare friend’s son with her children. My parents don’t compare with their friend’s children. But sometimes my mother tried to teach me same as my friends when she had met the parents of the friends. When I read this article, I can understand the parents. If I don’t do something but most people do, I would feel very shame. Then I’ll want to try to do that everyone are doing. I think sometimes competition makes us more challengeable and exciting, but except taking care of children. We have various methods to be a good parents but I think we don’t know which method best is. Therefore parents should try share some information about rearing children each other for the good parents. And they should believe they are the best of their kid. Also they should remember that white lies is a lie if they use often it, I think their children will follow their parents soon.
Ari, I also laughed when I laugh your article.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, I’ve believed that this situation happen in Thai culture only, but when I read your article I consider that Oh! it more universal than I thought Haha.
Actually, my mother has never compared between and others because my mother has little friends, but my close aunt always do that. She always talks about her friends’ children who are doctors or engineers or get scholar, and her daughter(my cousin) always think that why my aunt never tell us about her friends’ children who fail the exam or arrested?
I like your last sentencr Ari. Even if children don’t like some parent’s activities, when they grew up , they still do something which they used to hate.
Ari,
ReplyDeleteYour article reminds me to think about my parents habit. My mom used to do like that. She did with my relative, but I was a better one. Hahaaa...
At that time, I dont like him (my cousin) so, I always do everything better than him such as grades of exams, a scholarship, awards as well as sports. I did them very well. My mom was so proud in me. She often talked to her friends about me and my brother. I feel shy and did not want my mom do like that but i was also proud sometimes. Hahaa :)
Now, She doesn't do like that. I think, it is because i have grown up. However, when i think of that action, it makes me laugh like u said in the first paragraph.....
:)
JoHH, I like your comment :D
ReplyDeleteI thought parent should tell the truth and give children a reason when you want them to do something, but my idea was changed.
Now, I think sometimes we should speak white lies. One day, I had to take my nephew to shower, but he did not want to shower. I tried to give him many reason, but it did not work; moreover, I was too tried. Finally, I decide to speak white lie. I told him if he did not shower, ghost would come, and it worked.
I think I will tell him the truth and explain why I do like that, but it does not this time.
I think everybody have lied to others even though it is not white lie because sometimes is a necessary. We usually say something is not true to children especially when they cry or they need something in shopping mall. Family is the first teacher for children so it is hard to teach their child without a white lie because children are not mature. It is not good if parents always lie to them because they can know on someday and they may be a cheater in the future.
ReplyDelete